Every testimony is unique. Where I live, often titled “the Bible Belt,” many testimonies seem to sound the same. “I was saved and baptized when I was young and have attended church every time the doors have been open since.” Occasionally you will hear the testimony of, “I wasn’t saved until I was a teenager or young adult – and God delivered me from drugs, alcohol, sexual immorality, and I am a new creation.” For me, I am somewhere in between. I was saved when I was five years old, baptized at 8, and have been delivered from things as well. Let me explain.
I wasn’t saved from a terrible lifestyle at the age of five, haha. My testimony is more of who the Lord has been for me since the moment I chose to follow Christ. So much has arisen in my life that had potential of completely destroying me – but God has always been faithful to remind me (even at a young age) that He was not surprised by those circumstances and He already had a plan in place to deliver me from those struggles and trials…if I would but trust in Him.
I’ve also learned that I will never fully know the characteristics of God…but that it is an exciting journey as He keeps revealing more and more of Himself to me as I seek Him! He truly IS everything that we ever have and ever will need in this life.
At the age of 12 my biological father disowned me. The words, “I don’t give a (insert choice word). I never loved you anyway,” rang in my mind over and over for years after he hung up the phone in my ear. It was then that I realized just how much I had truly wanted the man who never paid any attention to me to love me. Heart break that went deeper than I knew my heart even reached wracked my soul. The mental prison in which I was held captive held me tightly for years. My self-image was defined by the derogatory words my father declared were my truth. It took me years to realize that the statements and hateful things he said were not my reality — but as a child of God, covered by the precious blood of the Lamb — I am made in the image of God – and I am made whole. I am clean. I am forgiven and sanctified. I am chosen. I am cherished and loved. I am beautiful. These things are still sometimes hard for me to say out loud – but God has been gently and patiently stripping the lies from my soul and replacing them with His truths and the reality that is mine in Christ Jesus. I walk confidently now instead of as a coward or one who is despised. I can love other people because I know the unfailing love God has given me and freely bestows upon others. I can now be a willing vessel to pour that love out upon others because of what He has accomplished in me.
God takes what the enemy means for our destruction and turns it to bring Him the utmost glory!
Over years, God has revealed Himself to me as Healer of heartbreak, Father to the fatherless, and the Giver of purpose (as He slowly re-grew my self-confidence.) This journey of healing and acceptance is still ongoing, but being able to look back and see all He has done for me as I have continually chosen to trust Him is unreal. It’s supernatural!
Besides that, He has provided for me time and time again – in the seasons of my life when I wasn’t sure where the next $10 was going to come from, He’d provide a day job somewhere with just enough to get me through. In the 10 overseas trips in which I’ve had the privilege of carrying the Gospel, He has provided financially, every single time, in very different, very specific ways. He never missed a dime that I needed.
I’ve watched Him and experienced His hand of physical healing time and time again. It is a new and awe inspiring miracle every time! From miraculous healings of back issues with the touch and powerful prayer of a friend, to being
healed of migraines, the dengue fever, and other such things…I’ve learned that healing comes in many ways, and He is able to use anything and anyone that He desires to administer that healing.
I’ve seen Him change the hardest heart to pliable and welcoming – yearning soil for the Word and for His Presence! This is perhaps one of the most amazing things about our God — He can do mind-blowing things that even the most powerful person couldn’t even think about doing. Man can change the surface of a person all day long — but the lasting changes happen on the inside – and only the Holy Spirit can change those things. A life changed radically can only be credited to God Himself – and those are the most amazing miracles to behold!
As I continue to seek Him only, and ask Him to give me a deeper yearning and desire for Him alone, I am seeing that anything besides Him is a broken cistern. Only He can satisfy. When I fall, He picks me up. When I cry, He wipes my tears. When I am heartbroken, He wraps me up in His unfailing and unwavering love. When I laugh, He smiles. When I need Him, He never fails.
This testimony will continue until the day He returns or calls me home. I will forever press on to spend the rest of my days running after the Lover of my soul with every fiber of my being. He alone is worthy.